Watched the Story of Stuff yesterday on U-Tube. Amazing how a simple reminder about all the crap, stuff, things, we accumulate in life brings awareness to how enslaved we have become to them. I recall a bit of wisdom from the Native American tradition that goes something like this: "Every object has a spirit attached to it. As I attach myself to this object (stuff) out of a needy desire, the spirit of the object attaches itself to me." The corollary is that with each attachment I become more possessive, more greedy and more in bondage to "them." The more objects of attachment, the more spirits are attached to me.
This truism was brought home to me as I was out riding my bike in McDonald Forest today. I was headed from the Witham Hill house to the top of Dimple Hill, about 17 miles round trip. I see many hikers with I-Pods. My guess is they are listening to music. What the fuck are they trying to drown out in the solitude of the forest? Stopped and talked to another biker on my way down, told him one of the things I appreciated about him was that he didn’t have earphones on."Yeah" he said. Neither of us could fathom going into the forest and missing the sounds of silence. Attachments!
I stop to take a water break at the 6 mile fork in the road, one goes to McCullock Peak (elev. 2178 ft.) the other to Dimple Hill (elev. 1478 ft.). I watch a small white moth, and listen for wings beating the cool spring air. The apparent randomness of its flight is mystifying. Probably sniffing the air for pheromones from a moth of the opposite sex. It is spring and the sexual sap is flowing. There is a rat-a-tat-tat high in a doug fir. A wood pecker looking for a late afternoon snack. The beating of beak against bark echos throughout the forest. The bursting of leaf buds explode new life everywhere I gaze. The forest screams, pay attention, pay attention!
This is only my second ride since getting over the flu two weeks ago. Don’t know if I have the stamina to make it to the top. The next half mile is a gentle up hill grade. I stop for more water just before the hairpin bend, need to stay hydrated. I now face a mile and a quarter that is a moderate to steep grind. Put my bike in low gear and prepare my mind. I know every curve and straight stretch on this road. I have ridden it many times, but today is going to be a challenge both mentally and physically if I am going to make it to the summit. Progress is slow, and that’s okay, one turn of the crank at a time. Don’t look up and too far ahead, stay focused on the immediate. Need to pay attention to my breathing. I know that if I try too go to fast I will get winded, lactic acid builds up in the muscles, and fatigue sets in. Staying at a steady pace is always best. Discipline.
I try to stay focused on my physical body’s needs and at the same time observe the beauty of the forest that surrounds me. This requires splitting my mind into two modes of conscious awareness. My physical eyes notice the road, the huge trees, the grassy under story of the forest floor. This is so different from the brushy coast range or the soft pine and fir needles covering the forest floor of the high Cascades. My minds eye pays attention to thirst, tiredness, breathing and heart rate. Being in such a beautiful place helps unite the two into one. In his essay Poetry and the Primitive, Gary Snyder states: "Outwardly, the equivalent of the unconscious is the wilderness: both of these terms meet, one step even farther on, as one."
Now McDonald Forest is a far cry from wilderness in the sense of "wilderness area," being roadless and relatively untouched by humans. Mac forest is, after all, the research forest of Oregon State University’s School of Forestry. As such it sees periodic thinning and clear cutting in small designated areas, but it also has an area set aside as "old growth." Yes, it is disconcerting to ride into an area where I haven’t been for some time and see that it has been logged. On the other hand, it is wonderful to have this resource so close and to be able to use it and share it with others.
I almost wrote, "with others of like mind." Which brings me back to stuff. I realize that stuff isn’t just the physical "things" we are attached to, it is also the mental junk that fills our conscious and unconscious mind. Meditation is found in many spiritual traditions, it is used in every case to clear the mind of extraneous stuff. Meditation takes many forms. Within the Buddhist tradition there is a form known as walking meditation. Since I can no longer walk comfortably, riding my bike has become, for me, my walking meditation. It keeps me focused and sane in a world that appears insane and hell bent for destruction.
When riding I feel a sense of at oneness with my body, my bike, and the diversity of sights, sounds, and smells of the forest. What’s strange is that the sense of oneness is also accompanied with the sense of aloneness. This is not loneliness. It is more of that sense of interconnectedness and inner connectedness. There was a song from the 70's that had a line that went something like this: "one is the loneliest number." But I believe that this is not true especially in a spiritual sense. The one, is the essence of and place from which all else is derived. The one describes wholeness.
I am beginning to feel the flush of success as I look up and see the flat where the road forks. When I get there I take a water break and a breather, before the next quarter mile to the summit. I haven’t seen anyone since I left the lower trails, but now a young biker passes me as if I was standing still. Ah youth. What the hell, at least I am out here.
I now leave the road for the connecting route to upper Dan’s trail and the summit. We’ve had quite a bit of rain in the last few days and the trail is still muddy. I have to get off the bike and push it for about 200 ft; its too steep and muddy. When I get to the top, the biker that passed me is just about to leave. We exchange greetings and wonderment at the scene that lays below us and to the south. There is fresh snow on the foothills of both the coast and Cascade mountains. The air is crisp and yet the sun is warm. The sky is a light blue with wisps of high clouds to the west, hints of more rain to come. There has been a hatch of small black gnats since I was here last - another sign of spring. I sit in the stillness, listen to their humming and sip warm chai tea from a bottle taken from my back pack. The sweetness of the tea adds to the delicious feast before me.
Life doesn’t look and feel so negative and oppressive, from up here. Feeling rested, I put the tea back in the pack, and pack positive thoughts into my mind. From the summit it is a good 2 ½ miles of downhill coasting. I try to keep my speed just under 20 miles per hour. Back in the forest, the sun’s warmth is filtered by the huge trees. The air at this speed has a chill to it. The chill is not cold, it brings a fresh awakening, the eyes tear up and my exposed skin tingles. Life! Simple life! Must remember, stuff isn’t required for this experience.
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